Thursday, April 4, 2013

3 on Thursday - Euphemisms for Sex

They're silly. They're funny. They're certainly not purple prose. I'm talking about euphemisms for sex. There is the mattress mambo, the horizontal hula...*sleeping* (right) together.

We've all used them, at one time or another. Sometimes so the 'adults' near us wouldn't know what we were talking about. Sometimes because we thought they were funny. There have been euphemisms for sex for as long as there has been sex...and that's a long time. Historically, there have been euphemisms like 'basket making' (what?!?) and even 'face making' (because, yanno, you make faces during...and then babies can come and babies have faces and...what??? once more time.

So, without further ado: today's 3 on Thursday: the funniest euphemisms for sex.

3. Blanket hornpipe. Okay, this is one of those historical euphemisms. It's from the 1800s and...I've got nothin' else. But can you imagine using this in conversation?!?

2. Doing the wild thing. Hey, I'm a child of the '80s, what can I say. We thought it was hilarious and oh-so-sneaky to say 'doing the wild thing' so our parents wouldn't know what our friends (not us, never us!) were doing when we were late for curfew.

1. Do the dance ... with no pants. This one just cracks me up. I can't say it without a little giggle or smirk. And I blame Sheldon Cooper. Totally.


So, those are my top 3, how about you? What is your favorite silly/weird/downright yukky euphemism for sex?